The other day this question came up in my “Healing the Inner Child’ group: What do you do when you hit the wall of resistance in your ‘healing’? To be honest, I’d rather use the terminology ‘returning to yourself or your original state‘ rather than ‘healing‘. You don’t need healing. What you need is to forget your conditioning which makes you believe that something is wrong with you. Forget the ‘false’ ideas and return to the truth, which is the KNOWING that you are OKAY.
This is why I like to use the word ‘de-conditioning’— from false ideas, thoughts and attitudes. So back to the original question: What do you do when you hit the wall of resistance in this process of de-conditioning? When, for example, you’ve signed up for a course knowing that you need it. You’ve committed to it fully & you want to make the most out of it. And then…once you have all the tools, practices and guidance, you start feeling too ‘lazy’ to take action. At the same time, you can sense that this laziness is a form of self-sabotage.
Well, there are a few things you could do in this scenario:
It’s a natural unconscious reaction to potential change, a sign that you’re about to stretch yourself beyond your comfort zone.
Welcome the resistance
It’s as though you were greeting a good, old friend. This is more or less true – resistance is one of your most familiar acquaintances besides fear, isn’t it? You could greet it like this: “Hey resistance, welcome! I see you and I acknowledge you! I would like to know, what do you need to be able to resist less? Just a little bit less?” Listen to the answers. Have an internal dialogue with Mr. or Ms. Resistance. Negotiate. Keep it light. Have some fun with it!
You could also choose to give in to laziness and not do ANYTHING, or actually BE it, fully, with your entire being. Do what you would normally when laziness kicks in. Binge watch some movies, leave your house messy, don’t answer the phone…whatever it is for you. Just do it fully – consciously choosing it, leaving no room for guilt or shame.
Take one action
Check in with yourself if there is any room besides the resistance to take one simple, one tiny action. Take one small step towards the very thing you are resisting. And see how you feel afterwards. You might discover that there is room for another step. Or you might find out that there was joy in taking that step forward and even feel inspired to take further actions.
Reach out for help
You don’t need to do everything alone! You don’t need to figure out how to better your life on your own! Bettering your life is already a TASK. Forget about doing it by yourself. It’s NORMAL to need help, allow yourself to seek it. You don’t need to hide it, or shy away. Actually – you should be PROUD of yourself for investing in bettering yourself!